Dating Naked - the TV show

[gregpc]

I am not sure I get it. My wife is against nudism/naturism and even finds casual nudity at home inappropriate and yet she says she loves the show Dating Naked. I said, I bet you might feel differently if they didn't gray out their genitals. She said, you're right. At least this could serve as an opening to see nudity correctly and as no big deal.

[Bare_Truth]

Greg.
If I know TV, the Naked gimmick is all about bringing in sexuality. And given today's type of programming the dating has a very strong sexual component to it also. I would suggest that you try complaining about the exploitation of the sexual aspect of the show, and stress the intimacy and relationship aspect. Dating is about finding a life mate who is truly compatible with whom one can have a life long relationship. Naturism is about experiencing the best that nature has to offer with someone you are committed to. Naturism puts the best most relaxing Edenic physical plesent experience with having a serious fun relationship with the person you love.

Now that has to be more than just words, it has to be from the heart. But if you can do that, I think it may just push all of her relationship and romance buttons.

You might for instance suggest that you both watch the program together and agree to talk about what is going right for the couples and what they do that might apply to the two of you. Then make an agreement to go to a resort and try to do the same positive things between the two of you.

If you play it right, she might just rise to the bait. ..... And if she does, then you have to play it right!
Playing it right might mean telling her that the woman in the couple is OK, but she is better, (but she has to know that you really mean it. Then make sure that going to a resort is all about your relationship with one another and skip the sex unless it is her idea, .



In my situation, I have a reluctant but very supportive wife....... BUT....
A. We don't have television!
B. She would never watch that show!
So my situation is essentially the reverse of yours in key ways. So who am I to offer advice. (but it is free and guaranteed to be worth at least every penny you paid for it )

[gregpc]

I actually don't watch much TV but I do watch this with her. Surprisingly, it's actually not about the sex so much as it shows how being naked breaks down the barriers and helps with non-sexual intimacy. I'm not saying it never comes up but so far, it seems to get downplayed. In fact, one guy repeatedly had sexual innuendos and the female was totally turned off. The show actually does a good job with the nudity part. It could just as easily be about nudists albeit non Christian nudists. My wife has serious issues with nudity outside this novel situation and so this show helps normalize it for her.

[jochanaan]

Well, we men's thought patterns often "evolve." Maybe hers is evolving.

[gregpc]

Let's hope so.

[nudie66]

I came across this show last night also... it seems to be a recent trend in Reality TV - Dating Naked, Skin Wars (body-painting competitions), Naked & Afraid, etc. ...

I rhetorically said to my wife (who BTW approves of & shares my fondness for nudity - Oh yes, we just got married, by the way), "If these types of shows are becoming so popular with viewers, then why isn't public nudity becoming commonplace, if the public is tuning in to see it so much?"

[JimShedd112]

I think it's for the novelty factor. However, I hope such programs will serve to normalize nudity so it becomes more widely accepted, as people begin to see members of the same and opposite sexes can be nude together without it immediately turning to a desire to have sexual relations.

Jim

[Ramblinman]

I actually don't watch much TV but I do watch this with her. Surprisingly, it's actually not about the sex so much as it shows how being naked breaks down the barriers and helps with non-sexual intimacy. I'm not saying it never comes up but so far, it seems to get downplayed. In fact, one guy repeatedly had sexual innuendos and the female was totally turned off. The show actually does a good job with the nudity part. It could just as easily be about nudists albeit non Christian nudists. My wife has serious issues with nudity outside this novel situation and so this show helps normalize it for her.

Clothing often serves as a disguise, a costume worn by an actor in a play.
Being nude can serve as a way for us to "get real", to be ourselves with others.
While nudity is often a prelude to sex in our culture, in a naturist context or in the context of this television show, nudity is a prelude to honesty.
Greg, I am familiar with your domestic situation and am praying that this becomes an opportunity for personal growth for both of you and greater oneness in your marriage.
Social nudity is sometimes a consequence of personal growth in this area, but there's more at stake here and we all know it.
It involves how we feel about the body that God gave us to inhabit while we live on this Earth, and perhaps about how we feel about the Lord himself.
If our body is "porn", is God a pornographer, playing some cruel joke on us by creating our bodies as they are?
No, God is often blamed for the acts of the evil spirit who rebelled against him so long ago.
Christians and people everywhere don't think through the logical consequences of their thoughts.
Many Christians don't even know their own Bible that well.

[gregpc]

"If these types of shows are becoming so popular with viewers, then why isn't public nudity becoming commonplace, if the public is tuning in to see it so much?"

Good question. I had asked that same question of my wife. If you can sit here and quote, "LOVE" the show Dating Naked, then how can you hate my nudity and nudism since, in the context of the show, it is EXACTLY the same even accomplishing the same purpose? She is watching a program that, although is using the novelty and shock value of nudity to get people to watch it, is actually promoting all the same things nudism does -- openness, honesty, healthy (non-sexual) intimacy, etc.

As for the public, I think many know the truth but do not realize how many of us there are and many are just afraid to admit it. I know several people at work who allude to going nude at home as a preference. As the same time, I know many vehemently oppose it, thinking it is dirty, inappropriate, etc. Unfortunately, while they might be ok with these shows, they don't see it as real (the irony of *reality* shows), and would oppose it really being this way in their own world.

I will add that one of the reasons I do not like television -- tell-a-vision -- and movies is precisely because they call them "programs" for a reason. That is, they use it to program the watcher to accept their ideas, and while they may have shows like Dating Naked, most of it appeals to the flesh so as to feed it which only makes it hungrier for more (what you feed grows). In the end, I see two main reason why public nudity isn't commonplace (I'm sure we can come up with others). First, people are "programmed" to think certain ways and think certain things are reality which are not, like nudity equals sex, sin, perversion, etc. Second, if it were common place, which they likely don't want, they might lose business and it is a big business. I do see this oxymoron with my wife to "love" this show yet hate the real thing which is exactly the same with the same results (in terms of the nudity part).

[gregpc]

I think it's for the novelty factor. However, I hope such programs will serve to normalize nudity so it becomes more widely accepted, as people begin to see members of the same and opposite sexes can be nude together without it immediately turning to a desire to have sexual relations.

I agree.

[gregpc]

Clothing often serves as a disguise, a costume worn by an actor in a play.
Being nude can serve as a way for us to "get real", to be ourselves with others.
While nudity is often a prelude to sex in our culture, in a naturist context or in the context of this television show, nudity is a prelude to honesty.
Social nudity is sometimes a consequence of personal growth in this area, but there's more at stake here and we all know it.
It involves how we feel about the body that God gave us to inhabit while we live on this Earth, and perhaps about how we feel about the Lord himself.

If our body is "porn", is God a pornographer, playing some cruel joke on us by creating our bodies as they are?

Of course, you realize you are "preaching to the choir," right? lol I have said this a long time, even on my website. I appreciate you pointing how, if we say the body equals porn, then God is a pornographer. That is so true!

Many Christians don't even know their own Bible that well.

This is actually a much larger problem than we know. In my own case, my wife touts her ideals but doesn't realize they go against the Bible in terms of ideals and does exactly what you said, makes God a pervert.

Greg, I am familiar with your domestic situation and am praying that this becomes an opportunity for personal growth for both of you and greater oneness in your marriage.

Thank you for praying for us. I didn't know you even remembered me. lol I am grateful for any prayers. This has been a serious issue in our home as my wife has some unresolved childhood issues that contribute to this issue. When we first married, she would not even undress in front of me and had to have the lights out. It was crazy! She's grown past that but she still sees nudity in a negative light. This is why I found it really odd that she "loves" the Dating Naked show which happens to depict nudity in the same vein and with the same results. Her own views have really challenged me so I appreciate your prayers. I will add you to my daily prayers, too (and I don't pray lightly). I am already praying for the site as a whole.

[jasenj1]

I'll throw a few thoughts into this thread. Dating Naked, et al., present nudity as something to be consumed. You WATCH people being naked, you're not encouraged or expected to BE naked. And the naked people usually (all?) fit pretty narrow body types, promoting what is "good looking". You are expected and encouraged to be a voyeur.

I've watched parts of a few episodes of Dating Naked. The show seemed to have a "and then they pair off to have sex" portion of the show which I did not like at all. To me it reinforced the idea that you get naked to evaluate a sexual partner and then give them a "test drive".

The less cynical side of me hopes these shows are causing conversations about nudity to be happening and people are trying it out and/or becoming more open to seeing others nude in general.

[Ramblinman]

I'll throw a few thoughts into this thread. Dating Naked, et al., present nudity as something to be consumed. You WATCH people being naked, you're not encouraged or expected to BE naked. And the naked people usually (all?) fit pretty narrow body types, promoting what is "good looking". You are expected and encouraged to be a voyeur.

I've watched parts of a few episodes of Dating Naked. The show seemed to have a "and then they pair off to have sex" portion of the show which I did not like at all. To me it reinforced the idea that you get naked to evaluate a sexual partner and then give them a "test drive".

The less cynical side of me hopes these shows are causing conversations about nudity to be happening and people are trying it out and/or becoming more open to seeing others nude in general.

I have not seen the Dating Naked show and I don't know if the implied off-screen mating was just for this couple or is expected of every couple in every episode.
Even many non-Christians would not engage in sexual intercourse after only a few days of acquaintance, as a matter of common sense even if theology doesn't come into play.

However, physical evaluation of a potential mate is something I strongly approve of.
While not the primary concern of Christians, I don't know of too many young people for whom physical attraction has NO importance.
It is rooted in biology and has some bearing on the ability to "be fruitful and multiply".
That's not to say that we have to breed before marriage, but seeing one another naked, observing how animated his or her expression is, mannerisms, physical fitness, is something that should not be disregarded.

For the older members here, we can marry and fall in love with someone for companionship alone.

And I realize that with the passage of time a couple will lose the youthful glow.
We all have a certain fondness for someone fat, bald, wrinkled, covered with scars and moles, lush back hair or saggy breasts and maybe missing most of our teeth: grandma and grandpa, even when we are married to grandma or grandpa!
But when they are young and courting, let's let young folks enjoy their youth (without jumping in the sack of course).

Okay, back to the television show: I understand why they feature young attractive people for a dating show.
I could argue that naturist magazines have historically not been filled with 80-year old models, we have put our most attractive people in magazines, particularly women, but their photos, AANR and Jim C Cunningham have documented a much wider demographic, (in more ways than one).

Can we have it both ways? Youthful beauty AND those who are, shall we say, more ordinary-looking; who can, in their own way, tell older, plumper folks that it is okay to take their place in the sun too!
While senior citizen calendar girls are the exception to the rule, they do have an important message to get across.
So would a television show about elderly naked people be a smash hit? Probably not, but as long as it aired, it would offer a word of encouragement to a sector of the population who sorely need it.

[jochanaan]

I came across this show last night also... it seems to be a recent trend in Reality TV - Dating Naked, Skin Wars (body-painting competitions), Naked & Afraid, etc. ...

I rhetorically said to my wife (who BTW approves of & shares my fondness for nudity - Oh yes, we just got married, by the way), "If these types of shows are becoming so popular with viewers, then why isn't public nudity becoming commonplace, if the public is tuning in to see it so much?"

As long as it's something somebody else does, it will never become commonplace. And television is notorious for discouraging action and activism.

[gregpc]

I'll throw a few thoughts into this thread. Dating Naked, et al., present nudity as something to be consumed. You WATCH people being naked, you're not encouraged or expected to BE naked.

This true for most of what you see on TV and in movies. Why is that sex, violence, etc, are the focus more often than not? Because that is what sells? I will say that in this case, it can encourage you to be naked as it desensitizes you to the idea that nudity is bad. It plants the idea in your mind -- another point of all "programming."

And the naked people usually (all?) fit pretty narrow body types, promoting what is "good looking".

Yes, of course, this is true. Again, it's meant to appeal to a certain audience. The interesting thing is, most people would not take this into account because they are used to seeing this sort of thing on TV. All the soaps have the pretty people in them.

You are expected and encouraged to be a voyeur.

That is a good point to an extent. That is, they gray out the genitals and if I were to ask my wife (a non-nudist) why she "loves" the show, it would not be because she cares about the nudity or how good the people look or that she is trying to see anything. She admitted that if they didn't block the genitals, she would not watch the show as she would feel that is inappropriate. Why would she "love" it though? Because the nudity puts you in a situation you would not (in the non-nudist world) find yourself which forces you to behave differently and creates unusual scenarios

I've watched parts of a few episodes of Dating Naked. The show seemed to have a "and then they pair off to have sex" portion of the show which I did not like at all.

I have watched most of the episodes with my wife and do not recall this being the norm. There are instances, but typically, it seems to be downplayed.

The less cynical side of me hopes these shows are causing conversations about nudity to be happening and people are trying it out and/or becoming more open to seeing others nude in general.

Yes, this is the focus for me. I try to focus on the positives, not the negative. I try to downplay the negative and accentuate the positive. In this regard, it has a positive effect on my wife. I was even surprised when I overheard her tell our grown sons that they "should get naked and..." I didn't hear what the and was but for her to say this is a total turnaround from her past mentality. I asked what they were talking about but no one answered me, but I felt this was due to what she saw on Dating Naked (she already knows my stance on this).